Sunday, 15 March 2020

PP Presentation & Script



SCRIPT-ish


1. HELLO
:)

2.  FIRST YEAR 
- Having only really learned what illustration was during Foundation I was still pretty naive starting first year, all I really knew was I liked pictures and liked making them. 
- learned so much during this year, the biggest lessons were in the approaches to making an image, we were pushed to think harder, reflect more, drawing is thinking etc.
- I somehow managed to avoid Photoshop and the likes through the whole year (minus the inductions), my laptop at the time couldn't handle me downloading the Photoshop trial so I used to minimally edit things using Microsofts own picture editor or.. PowerPoint.
- My first business cards were even made on lovely old PowerPoint. I think this was valuable though, I couldn't hide behind polishing my images up later.
- I did a few print fairs during this year which were a good confidence boost, even if looking back at my first year work is incredibly painful.
- Definitely come a long way since first year, but weirdly I think I was maybe most confident back then? probably just down to naivety, not comparing or worrying so much. I wouldn't change it though, I think confidence struggles I have now are due to thinking so much around making images and where they can exist, which isn't a bad thing? just hard at times


3. SECOND YEAR -
- I saw a big jump in my work from first to second year.
- The first 'About the Author' project was really valuable in getting better at printmaking, and really indulging in one resource (the author we chose) from which to exhaustively make content from. I much preferred the freedom that second year provided in terms of less rigid outcomes.
- Was the year I finally started to teach myself the basics of Photoshop which was a big step for me.
- Second half of second year was very stressful, I ended up taking on far too much and had really unhealthy work habits whilst I was animating a music video and juggling other projects.
- Learnt the hard way about burn out and mental health wobbles from pressure and stress.
- Some of the work from second year I am still happy with like the Market book, which has lead onto opportunities I'm doing now
- The music video was difficult and stressful, but I learned a lot and taught myself a lot of skills (if IT saw how I was using After Effects they'd run away, definitely went the longest most convoluted way around animating with my shabby tech skills)




4. THIRD YEAR
- this has been the most enjoyable year
- really enjoying the freedom enjoyed the most? Freedom and have developed my skills a lot since first year
- Confidence has been a big issue this year, imposter syndrome and not thinking I'm good enough. - Felt better once FMP started, I think these are issues I'll have throughout my career and they come in peaks and troughs but thats ok!
- Loving having a place in the studio to work, studio culture has been really lovely this year, so supportive and positive
- Finally feeling like my work looks semi professional, I now have the skills to make things seem polished, massive step from first year and the powerpoint editing days




5. FIRST TERM SLUMP
- I really struggled during the first term
- I received a commission from Mosaic Science / Wellcome Science- my biggest commission so far , first time with an art director, first editorial commission
- I put SO much pressure on myself during this time it was really unhealthy and it really knocked me back
- I tried to mould my practice into something that wasn't me, I don't recognise myself in the images I made
- Wish I could do it again but I'm glad I got through it, I just don't think I was ready within myself
- Juggling COP during this big commission was really difficult too, I struggled with stress and lack of sleep and confidence,
- bad bad times yikes




6. COP
- I changed my COP project pretty late on in the module but I am so glad I did
- Ended up doing a project about walking and how walking and drawing can be used as speculative tools to explore / understand our environment with
- I really enjoyed the research for this, and it was a valuable thing to be able to get stuck into when things weren't going well mental health wise
- It was an almost selfish choice of project, giving myself an excuse to go on lots of walks, but it was a really important decision to make and it really helped
- Whilst I wasn't necessarily that pleased with my practical outcomes for this project, I was pleased with the essay which sounds strange - but it was a topic that I became really passionate with and it changed my whole mindset with walking.
- Would've been great to have started with this idea at the beginning, but that can't be helped and looking back I'm pretty proud of myself for getting through a hard patch




7. TURNING POINT
- up until this workshop my confidence with my work was really low, I was having a shit time, COP was stressful etc etc
- This risograph session turned things around for me I think
- I managed to make my design in the night before, and its one of my favourite things I've made this year
- It was a big boost knowing I could make something I like when I don't put pressure on myself, I am capable of making something I can be proud of
- Felt very me, was great to be able to use my collected bits and bobs of ephemera for something
- Loved working in this way mixing the processes
- Felt like I was making work for me again, took off the pressure and made me overthink it less
- Loved riso and definitely want to utilise and experiment with it again


8. FMP
- this has been my favourite project so far!!!
- indulging in something for me
- first time I'm making the actual content I'm responding to , took a while to get going but came to my stories through drawing which was a really rewarding process
- writing stories is something I did as a kid and haven't done since but I'm loving it, taking my research into practical means - using the idea that folklore is made from a melting pot of voices which are untraceable, so I've constructed poems in a Bowie / William Burroughs style by cutting out words from various magazines, to echo the idea of different voices - and I'm weaving this poems into my writing
- this project has opened me up into a really interesting expanse of global cultural research into folk tales and folk art, its something I could go on forever with
- learned so much about things I knew nothing about like Inuit printmaking which I'm now obsessed with
- storytelling is a massive part of my practice, I'm having lots of fun being able to completely indulge in it
- learned new processes like sewing - looking at different vehicles of storytelling


9. HANBURY
- I was pretty nervous for Hanbury, I was worried that I would ruin an opportunity with my shyness and not feel able to talk to any of the speakers, but once I got over this fear of being annoying it got much better
- it was an intense day but I learned lots and it was a valuable experience - especially hearing from fields I didn't really know anything about like advertising and agencies
- It was really interesting to hear about people who have full time jobs in the creative sector, it all seems v appealing. I do want to be a freelance illustrator but the idea of having a steady job in a steady environment that is fulfilling and creative sounds great and something I might be interested in. - I had lots of fun making a promo materials to take down
- Instead of making business cards I decided to make 3D wooden trees (oxymoron). My practice / personality is all about THINGS. I like objects and collecting and ephemera and tactileness, so it felt fitting.
- It was a new skill learning how to use the laser cutter and I had to get a 2 hour crash course in Illustrator (something I've avoided since the induction in first year)
- They got a nice reaction to the people I handed them out to which was really lovely.
- Planning on making some wooden puzzles and sculptures for my FMP so it was good practice to put this to good use
- I think physical things are lovely to receive - receiving letters feels so special!! So I think it might be something I look into in the future when I'm reaching out to clients?
- For my publication I made the cover look like a knock off vintage penguin book, partly so it was memorable, partly because I've got a book out the library about vintage penguin covers and I'm v obsessed at the moment.
- I found trying to make this portfolio very difficult at first - I was struggling with confidence and disliking lots of my work but this got better as I made revisions. A big step was taking out the editorial work I'd done for Mosaic Science / Wellcome Trust - I was including this just for the client name, but I hate the work and it reminds me of The Big Slump, and I instantly felt better once I took it out .. funny that


10. ONLINE PRESENCE

- The internet is a funny thing but it has been a valuable tool to me during these few years.
- During first year I had a tumblr site because it was free, but it was so unprofessional looking
- Made a proper website in second year, so glad I did, I was in a slump when I made it and it weirdly boosted my confidence seeing all my work in one place?
- When I have more time / money / skills I'd like to make a more interesting, possibly interactive website, but for now this does the job !
- I think instagram is a really valuable tool for illustrators, but I don't think it needs to be the same as a website, my favourite practitioners accounts are those which show their process and personality. You can still be professional whilst retaining personality and not just posting final pieces. I think its important to see honesty - I think its approachable and human, so thats what I try to do with my instagram
- The highlights feature is cool - I keep it like a diary of interesting things I spot, or good books etc
- I've been fortunate to get some work through instagram , but I think its v vital to step away from instagram at times - it can be completely overwhelming seeing just a massive stream of images constantly, and its important to try and not compare myself, my worth is not my level of productivity.


11. CLIENT WORK
- I've had a much healthier relationship with commissions than I did in second year where I was trying to be too much to everyone, not valuing my work or myself enough.
- This year I've been mindful not to take on too much, because I made that mistake last year
- I'm very grateful to be getting commissions, but I have gotten better at saying 'no' to things that
I'm not interested in or which don't value my practice.
- The importance of working for joy, taking on jobs I'm excited for and where I know I'm going to
be treated well by the client, standing up for myself
- Gotten better at pricing my work and not selling myself short, but this is something I still need to
work on and I'm sure I'll get better with practice
- I've learned the hard way about the importance of real contracts
- Did a job for a bar in Leeds where I made artwork to go alongside cocktails in the menu, big
fiasco with payment, I was waiting and emailing for 7 months before I actually got paid - learned not
to be scared to stand up for myself and not be such an apologetic pushover in emails - staying friendly but professional!!
- Also a licensing fiasco where a bar used my work EVERYWHERE even though it was only intended for one thing - proud of myself for asking for licensing fee and knowing my worth
- Not maliciousness but just lack of knowledge of what they can do with my artwork
- Will join the AOI soon
- Still got a lot to learn
- Got some exciting commissions on at the mo which I feel comfortable and confident in, not out of my depth - is this... growth??


12. MURALS
- One of my first year goals was to do a mural one day - Started doing window murals last year for a bar in Leeds city centre and a cafe in Chapel Allerton,
both v supportive businesses, given me more work, but I've been stuck in the same visual style as the
first ones I did which I don't really recognise myself in anymore - but I try and change them up as
much as I can to feel current to my current practice
- Managed to get my first actual painted mural back in August which was a kitchen mural!!! So fun
n so different, really enjoyed this
- This has lead onto a potential commission with a pizza restaurant in Oakwood that the guy runs
- I usually make quite small scale work so it's really cool thinking about my practice in terms of
how it will work large scale, requires a different way of thinking
- I really enjoy murals and its something I'd love to properly get into, I've seen callouts on the
walls around uni so I might apply for that in April!


13. WORKING WITH MUSICIANS
- Really enjoy working with musicians, collaborating with a creative from a different field, brings new ideas, new ways of looking & ways of absorbing & ways of applying illustration
- My boyfriend is a musician which has opened me up to the Leeds music scene which is a vibrant and supportive community
- Done work for one of his bands Sea Legs - love working with them, we're on the same page in terms of aesthetic taste, really fun to come up with ideas of what we can do. Taught myself how to animate and made them a music video (was a stressful rushed 2 week thing but definitely want to do more in the future)
-Lead to Far Caspian, tshirt design
- Orla Gartland, Irish musician, done 2 t shirt designs for her, shes really lovely, great experience working with her, sends me audio feedback which is fun
- Music is a big place for illustration, especially at the moment I'm seeing a lot of my favourite bands going for illustration for single/album artwork which is really exciting. Would love to keep working within this industry in the future.




14. DOING BETTER
- Recently I am doing so much better in terms of healthy working habits and being kinder to myself.
- My confidence is getting better in my work and in myself (even things which seem small like the fact I finally feel confident enough to wear my hair down lol)
- I'm sleeping better, I'm not working myself silly by staying up til 4am
- I've started reading again which has been a really big thing this year, it calms me down and I love it, I think its contributed massively to me being able to have written my 4 stories for FMP, I've also started a personal project where I redesign the book covers of books I've been reading, loving this project, its just a personal project which I enjoy doing to take time out, but also book covers is something I want to do in the future so its good practice I guess
- I've recently started ceramics classes with my friend at Leeds College of Music, its been amazing to have 2 hours put aside every week where I can be creative without pressure and brain stress. Just making with my hands for making with my hands sake. I'm learning so much too and its been a real lovely calm against the stresses of third year.
- I think its really important to keep learning new skills and finding ways to shut off my whirry brain. Cathartic, like sewing my tapestry


15. NON-ILLUSTRATION INSPIRATION

- Inspiration away from contemporary illustration has been really important to me during this course, especially third year
- Whilst its great and inspiring to find inspiration online (instagram / pinterest), it can become insanely overwhelming if I look for too long, and can lead to unfortunate falls into comparing myself
- So I think finding inspiration through other means (productive procrastination) is really important to keep my brain bubbling but not burning.
- I'm really going to miss the library here once we graduate. Something I've loved doing this year is just wandering the library without agenda and just getting a load of big books out, I've discovered loads of new practitioners this way, and found some great books like an anthology of vintage penguin book covers, yum.
- Similarly I find wandering about Waterstones in town really inspiring and calming so I do that a lot. Smell of fresh books n even fresher illustrated covers. woo
- Music is massive to me in my practice, I make silly playlists and sing loud
- Other forms of inspiration like taking pictures of nice packaging at the shops, going to the cinema, watching video essays, museums, gigs, walks. important!!!!



16. VISITING PRACTITIONERS
- I've really loved the breadth of practitioners who have given talks during my 3 years here, some influential ones = Laura Carlin, Jake Hollings, Joey Yu, Nicolas Burrows (workshop was amazing), Olivia Ahmad, Molly Fairhurst, Lizzie Stewart, Everpress etc
- I have a bad habit of pre-judging successful people and thinking they will be really intimidating, but they are just normal people who are super friendly and enthusiastic and approachable!!
- Loved the talk from Olivia Ahmad, was incredible to learn about a career path I'd never thought about, her job sounds dreamy and listening to her talk so passionately was so inspiring. 

Laura Carlin talk towards the end of first year was so important. I found a similar talk she did at Offset in Dublin which is online and I've watched it so many times.
- its fine to not try and be freelance straight away. Give yourself time to breathe and settle, she waitressed for 4 years before going fully freelance.
- evolve and learn new skills - she took evening classes in ceramics when the recession hit - but shes now so well known for her ceramics
- Inspiration away from illustration is important
- recognising the importance of childhood, making links between what you draw now and what you were interested in drawings as a kid - history is important - importance of roughs - working on multiple roughs at once, means you won't get demotivated, keep the flow
- shes just brilliant



17. IMPORTANT PRACTITIONERS

- Hockney - Hockney always!!! the variety in his work, constantly evolving, don't box yourself in
importance of drawing. make make make. experiment always. his etchings have been really invaluable to me during uni - got to see them in the flesh. storytelling. hes just great

- Laura Carlin - raw. human. immediate. talks about importance of kids and the way kids see the world. storytelling is vital. inspiration away from illustration. her work is low fi and has a handmade quality, really motivating to see her success as this is the type of work i'm interested in making and sometimes the illustration world at the minute can feel dauntingly digital?? my downfall in the editorial commission was trying to change my practice. need to stick to my guns.
Timeless image making, exists beyond trends

- Ben Shahn - really into Ben Shahns drawings this year. going back to basics and drawing. Started ink and dip pen this year and have loved it. Expressiveness through simple lines. Telling stories subtly. Gorgeous. Importance of fine artists and getting books from the library (Matisse, Eastern European 60s poster artists,

- Jesus Cisneros - PLAY. play play!!! Have fun with it. Exhaustive image making. Charming.

- Bill Traylor - Also gotten very into Naive Art and Outsider Art - making work for no external validation, just the joy of making - people like - Bill Traylor, Alfred Wallis, Henri Rousseau etc

Its important to stay aware of the current illustration climate and whats happening within contemporary illustration, and I love this, but its also important to not feel like you need to mould yourself to make similar stuff to be successful. I've learned through this degree of admiration not comparison, still working on it but getting there.



18. CONTACT REPORT FROM SECOND YEAR
- For my contact report in second year I sent a zine to Nick White which he kindly filled in and sent back.
-This was a really fun experience, working collaboratively like this isn't something I'd done before and I'm keen to do something like this again, could be a fun project to set up?
- I keep this on my desk, its been very valuable to my practice, with some great wisdom and advice in it:
- importance of play
- importance of analogue, tactileness!!
- ask why? what? where? who? when? but mostly why?
- stop looking at the internet
- draw draw draw, work work work, do other things besides work work work
- if you are interested in stuff you will be interesting and therefore make interesting work
- don't worry about what everyone else is doing
-get feedback but also trust yourself
- don't give up, you can do it (you can do lots of things)

19. WORKING HABITS
- My working habits have gotten healthier recently, less all nighters, better sleep etc
- I do still work best at night which is okay, just difficult to manage with uni structures
- I like alone time too, and thats okay, but I also like working in the studio - I think the balance is important
- Illustration can be a lonely job, its important to stay social, in the future if I can afford I would love to have a shared studio, listening to Molly Fairhurst talk about her studio culture sounded lovely - a place to share ideas and to make a potentially lonely job less lonely
- I'm a collector, I'll never be a minimalist and thats okay. I'm quite like a magpie, I get very obsessed over a certain thing for a time (at the moment its vintage matchbox labels)
- Surrounding myself with inspiration is important too, books, prints, spreading out!!!
- Sketchbooks are so important to my practice, I need a place to dump ideas, write countless to do lists that I don't stick to, and work things out. They're a great place to play, and throughout the course the lines between my personal sketchbook and uni sketchbooks have blurred, I don't feel the need anymore to make my un sketchbooks feel finished or make sense, theyre a place for me to work things out and develop ideas.
- 6 memos was a great brief in making me think about my practice, I started this little sketchbook called Scraps and made small collages with the bits and bobs strewn on my desk - this was a really fun exercise, made some accidental collages I really liked. Good resource to jump back into. Collage helps me when I'm in a slump


20. AFTER GRADUATION
- My immediate plans after graduation are to stay in Leeds and get a part time job whilst doing freelance, with the hope of freelance becoming my main source of income over time
- I love Leeds. I love the sense of community amongst creatives, the sense of community amongst independent small businesses, the music scene, the friends I have here in different fields of creative industries. I'm v happy here
COLOURS MAY VARY PROJECT!
- Since the CMV show in second year I've been in contact with CMV a lot, they are the loveliest of lovely people
- We were chatting at Print Stuff last year when we both had stalls there and they bought one of my Kirkgate Market books, this has evolved into a project that I'll be doing with them over the Summer!
- The project will consist of a limited edition publication and an exhibition about Kirkgate Market
- We've applied for a grant from Leeds Inspired, and Becky has chatted to the people at the Market about this, the plans are for it to be a double venue exhibition, both at CMV and at the Market, with potential future opportunities like workshops / guided walks / larger artworks like murals etc which is super exciting
- The publication is going to be the first in a series that CMV are doing, the publication is being designed by Saul Studio who designed the Sarto identity, so then each future collaborator will work with them to put their work into the book template, eventually producing a collection of collectable publications about various places around Leeds
- Matt has been really helpful during this process in helping me work out pricing and the likes. After a couple of meetings with Becky and Andy we've decided to view it as a 'residency' type thing, I'm being paid for a months worth of work and then from the work produced then it'll become the book and exhibition
- I am so excited for this project, I love the market, and I'm going to be allowed access to the upstairs and to places not open to the public which is SO EXCITING, I'm also eager for this to be an in depth and collaborative project, I want to spend time chatting to the market stall owners and the people who make the market what it is today, this is something that lacked in my second year short project about Kirkgate Market because I didn't have time
- Its been a big confidence boost to have CMV deem me worthy of doing this project with them, before I got to know them I always wanted to do something with them, they are so supportive and its been a really valuable experience so far, very excited to get stuck in !


21. THE FUTURE?

- I don't really know where I'll be in a few years time but that's okay, - I'm keen to become a freelance illustrator, thats the dream, and I hope my confidence continues to grow and I can be kinder to myself when taking on commissions - Talking to Ben has reassured me that my worries about imposter syndrome are completely normal, he has these worries too! He's so successful and humble and its reassuring that even someone I look up to faces the same anxieties that I do, it doesn't mean I'm not cut out for the freelance life - Here are 2 of my dream clients that I would one day love to work with - Green Man and Folio Society - Green Man is a music festival in Wales that I've been going to for a couple of years now, the visual identity of the festival is always amazing, every year they pick an illustrator who works with a design company to produce the visuals for the whole festival - posters / merch / tickets / animations / branding on beer cups / signage / large cut out characters around the festival. My FMP has gotten me completely immersed and in love with folk tales and folk art, and its so exciting to see a modern application to this kind of work, some of my favourite illustrators like Nous Vous and Sunniva Krogseth have done this job in the past. I'm really enjoying developing characters and my own stories, so this is the kind of project which would be a dream! At Hanbury I got chatting to Arthur from Polytechnic who designed the typeface for Green Man!! I geeked out a lot about it and it was fascinating to hear how they designed it with inspiration from old Welsh type etc. I love projects like this with historical depth and interesting links. Eeeeeeee - Folio Society produce absolutely beautiful illustrated editions of books, some of my favourite illustrators have done work for them including Laura Carlin / Jesus Cisneros etc. This is the dream storytelling brief. To immerse yourself into a body of text, a whole world encased within 2 boards and illustrate it mmmmm. Storytelling is intrinsic to my practice, really enjoying my FMP, would be a dream to get a commission which feels like a similar way of working and approaching image making. Obviously these are BIG dream clients. I'm just daydreaming. Away from freelance though I have recently been having some wobbles and worries about life and my place within the world. I'm very invested in social justice and climate justice issues, and sometimes when I'm sat stressing over a drawing for half an hour I feel selfish, like I'm not doing enough? It stems down to a feeling of guilt, I'm very lucky to be doing what I love so sometimes I feel guilty when I take time off or stress, its a privilege to be doing what I do. (I know this is silly but I can't help it) I do want to be a freelance illustrator, and I know that it is a valuable and important career choice don't get me wrong, but I also want to do more with my life, something that allows me to be hands on in tackling these issues and making a difference if that makes sense? I'm not quite sure what yet, but I know I need to do something more, I think I'm just frustrated at the moment. I'm very worried about the state of the world and sometimes I just feel like I need to be putting more energy in tackling these problems rather than just being angry about them. I've also been getting quite interested with the prospect of teaching recently. The tutors and way of teaching during this course has been invaluable to my development as a practitioner and I really enjoy having crits in groups and talking about ideas and illustrations place within the world. This is something I'll need to do more research about but its an idea I have floating around at the moment

22. CHILDLIKE CURIOSITY

(heres an anteater i did aged 5)
- I think in first year I realised that I was basically just after the same levels of curiosity and naivety kids have. Kids are the best artists - I've been working towards these ideals of working without the need for external validation, this makes your work sing louder and have more meaning. Kids don't give a shit they just make, they don't care. They also see the world in the best way, curious about everything, get excited over the small things in life - I'm working on knowing my worth and measuring my own success for myself, and maintaining play and curiosity - I'm really going to miss this course I’ve learned so much and had the best 3 years of my life so far, its been hard at times but its been amazing - I think illustration is like learning to drive a car, I only really properly learned to drive after I'd passed my test, equipped with the skills and left to my own devices. So hopefully I'll continue to grow and develop and gain confidence and learn things (and not crash like I did with driving). I'm excited


Thought I'd finish up by reading out the manifesto I wrote myself during Matt and Katie's Manifesto session a few weeks ago which I think sums up where I'm at at the moment and where I want to be:
1. KEEP LOOKING - Stay curious always. Walking helps. There's lots to take in

2. KEEP PLAYING - Keep having fun and discovering new things. Never lose the joy and intrigue.

3. STAY TRUTHFUL - Stay truthful to your values and morals.

4. STAY ENGAGED - Stay engaged in the wider world and the current issues. Illustration is a privilege, use it wisely.

5. KEEP COLLECTING - Ephemera is great!!! Learn about history. Keep learning. Stay sentimental. Memories are important.

6. KEEP MAKING - Illustration can be hard but you're lucky to be doing what you love. Try to have fun even when its difficult.




23. CHEERS FOR YOUR EARS. QUESTIONS?

also would anyone like a wooden tree 





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